"Hey, Kelly. Do you smoke?"
"No, I don't."
"Oh. Well good for you."
"Wow."
"What is it?"
"Hmm? Oh it's nothing really. I just didn't know people got congratulated for not purposely killing themselves."
"Oh."
"Do I get a cookie?"
I've actually had the first third of this conversation a few times. It's usually followed by "Yeah, I really need to quit." which itself is followed by a long drag. I can only assume it's their attempt at irony, which while technically proficient, is undoubtedly unintentional. Yeah. They totally want to quit.
Naturally the rest of the conversation up there is where I would absolutely love for it to go.
I also like telling people I don't drink. I have to reassure them a few times because they never believe me and keep whittling down the instances in which I might drink. Like so:
"So you don't go to bars?"
"You don't drink at parties?"
"You don't drink at home?"
"You don't drink ever?"
I mean it. No.
Is it seriously that hard to believe that somebody of legal drinking age doesn't want to and chooses not to drink?
I guess it's just because of the way I was raised that being told "Good for you." for not doing something that's bad for me throws me off so much.
One Happy Bunch
5 years ago
5 comments:
Adam doesn't drink either, and I hate the way people talk to him because of it.
LOL.....good for you....LOL
my favorite part was "do I get a cookie?"
Kelly you know how happy I am that you never have gotten into any of that crap. As far as smoking goes, try to have sympathy with those who are trying to quit. It really is an addiction and I'm sure that most of them really do want to become non-smokers. I'm just happy that Courtney was able to quit smoking. I know that sometimes she may be tempted but she doesn't give in, which makes me very very proud of her.
I've had that same conversation many, MANY times, especially the drinking one. Everyone thinks "well, but you MUST in (insert situation here)...
It just blows their little alcohol-ravaged minds!
My favorite though, is all the people, and I've found this mainly true with girls, who, when asked if they smoke, will answer, "No... Well, unless I'm drinking, but that's only when I'm drinking."
And these people actually have the nerve to list themselves as nonsmokers on their health insurance forms! Never mind that they go out drinking 3 to 5 nights each week, by which time their non-smoking time is pretty much overtaken by their smoking time...
Bro, I am glad that you feel the same pain I did. People would freak out at parties when I would turn down a beer, and try to convince me that they had seen me wasted the weekend before, and that I should just drink it for them.
I will never understand the people who need booze to be happy.
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